Today was the annual service of the gas boiler and 'domestic appliances'. Every year a different engineer arrives from the same company and every year I hear the same spiel: "I don't know who put this [pipe, screw, pump, glass, light, other (delete as required)] here missus but it's got to come out." There follows a deal of huffing and puffing, tramping through the house to the van for spare parts, filling in of forms and finally a summary of what has been done and how it would have taken half the time if the last man had known his job.
I don't know if these engineers are insecure and feel the need to impress me with their singular expertise or maybe it is the first thing they are taught in their apprenticeship:
"Now, lads, you look inside, scratch your head and say, 'What idiot did this?' That gets you a Stage 1 Certificate in Denigration"